The Wizard of Oz

There isn’t much left that I can say about this film that hasn’t been said millions of times by critics much greater I. The film is a timeless classic, and it will be a part of American culture forever. The famous lines, the enchanting characters, and the amazing songs are well known and well loved by everybody. The renowned story is light-hearted and fanciful, but at the same time is dark and, in fact, rather sinister. I think that is one of the reasons I love it so much, and indeed why everyone does. Undeniably, “The Wizard of Oz” is one of the most famous movies ever made, and it deserves every bit of its fame.

When the film first came out in 1939, it wasn’t very popular at all. In fact, it flopped at the box office, and didn’t win even one Oscar later. Over time, however, through annual screenings of the film on television and rapidly growing popularity, it soon became what it is today, the number one most watched movie of all time and top ten best movie of all time. “Oz” is also the number one most quotable movie of all time. “Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!” “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore…” The list goes on and on. You would also be extremely hard-pressed to find someone who didn’t know who the Wicked Witch of the West was, or someone who didn’t love and appreciate them. That goes for the musical side of film, too, i.e. “Somewhere over the Rainbow.”

The film starts off light-heartedly and pleasantly, with Dorothy vying for her aunt’s and uncle’s attention as they go about their morning chores. But then, ominous music begins to sound and the malicious spinster Mrs. Gulch approaches the farm, meaning to take away Dorothy’s dog Toto. A lot of the film is like that, where everything is happy and wonderful and then all of a sudden, things take a turn for the dark and gloomy. But since this is a family film, and the special effects are anything but remotely believable, a lot of the dark nature of the film is hidden. Nevertheless, that threatening, sinister element remains, and it makes for a much more gripping and interesting story.

It is near impossible to find a film at the level of “Oz,” by means of fame and popularity, or by means of sheer quality. The quotes, the characters, and the fantastic songs are constantly referenced and spoofed. The story is joyful and child friendly but is mixed with dark and sinister undertones, in very pleasing way. This film deserves a strong ten out of ten stars, and I only regret that I can’t give it more. “The Wizard of Oz” is one of the greatest of all pop culture icons, and will remain so for a long, long time.

Clash of the Titans

Disappointment is the only word I would use to describe how I felt exiting the theater. “Clash of the Titans” suffers mainly from the same thing that brought down “Alice in Wonderland.” The 3D effects were awful simply because the movie was transformed into three-dimensional instead of being filmed that way. Also, I was extremely let down by the special effects. All of the best scenes for CG action were given away in the previews. The original story was messed with too much, and ended up not making much sense. This film had potential to show up the 80s original, but instead it totally botched it.

“Clash of the Titans” was originally filmed for 2D, but in post-production it was hastily converted to 3D. As such, the effects looked worse than those old View-Master toys we had as children. They actually dwarfed the visuals. Your eyes feel like they are being pulled out of your head because the visuals look like they have been stretched back into the screen instead of towards you. It is a very unpleasant experience, and not at all worth the extra cash.

In a movie such as “Clash of the Titans” it is absolutely necessary that the special effects be perfect. And they succeeded in that area. The effects were very, very good, all the way through. In the previews, we saw main character Perseus battling various evil creatures. And that was about all that happened in the movie. In other words, all of the good action scenes were spoiled in the previews, which took all of the fun out watching them. “Oh yeah, I remember that, I saw it in the trailer…” was all I was thinking throughout the two hour running time. You could get the gist of the entire movie without ever having to pay money to see it.

This film is, of course, a remake of the 1981 “Clash of the Titans.” In the original, the hero Perseus killed monsters and traveled to the Underworld all to save his one true love from Hades’s wrath. In this version, he does all these things because he’s ticked off at Hades for killing his family and because he has daddy issues with Zeus. Not only is this identical to the storyline of February’s “Lightning Thief,” but it also totally changes the essence of the film, in a bad way. At least in the original, Perseus had a good reason for risking his life over and over again for the girl. In this film, it just doesn’t add up.

Overall, “Clash of the Titans” was just a bad remake of the original film. It’s best special effects were all shown in the theatrical trailer, and they were worsened by cheap, headache-inducing 3D effects. The story was screwed around with, and the end result was terrible. This film isn’t worth seeing in theaters, and especially not in 3D. It gets 4 out of 10 stars. You’ll get what you want in the original.

Book of Eli

Here we have the second chapter of 2010’s post-apocalyptic movie marathon. Chapter One, “The Road,” was actually pretty good. But before anyone could even come close to wanting to see another one, unoriginal “Book of Eli” snuck its way into theaters. While Washington and Oldman played their parts well, the acting was sub par. There was not much of story, the dialogue was pathetic, and the ending was drawn out and utterly terrible. “Eli” audiences will be checking their watches many times before it finally ends. The pros: it’s easy to make spoofs of on Saturday Night Live.

The exact year is unknown, but what remains of humanity lives in a post-apocalyptic era where the most basic of necessities are fought and killed for. Washington’s character is essentially nameless, although if you stick it out long enough, or bother to recall the movie’s title, you’ll know him as Eli. He makes his way across the charred, barren landscape with an impressive amount of fighting equipment strapped to his torso, and an unstoppable determination to travel west. He also zealously guards a heavy, leather-bound tome that he calls “the book,” although clearly it’s the Bible. Anyone who tries to separate Eli from his book ends up separated from himself.

The movie was also chock-full of logical failures. While a character like Eli does radiate pure awesomeness with every step, all of the violence and carnage generated wherever he goes doesn’t really seem typical of a man ordered by God himself to carry the last Holy Bible to safety. Also, people in “Eli” don’t seem to feel pain. A man gets his hand cut off, and he just looks at it. No screaming, no falling to the ground in agony, or anything. It doesn’t even bleed all that much. This same thing happens a few more times before the film’s inevitable end. Unfortunately, the end came about an hour too late.

The ending of the movie was awful. Eli, the immortal messenger of God, the one who is mysteriously protected by an invisible force at all times, died because the bad guy shot him in the stomach. How profound. The director was kind of enough to provide a twist at the end, however. The only problem was, most everyone saw it coming in the first half hour of the movie.

All things considered, the film was an unoriginal waste of time and money, and it earns 2 out of 10 stars. One star each for Washington and Oldman, but otherwise a terrible movie. It’s definitely not worth seeing in theaters, though maybe worth renting in a few months, if you’re fond of apocalypse movies.